Monday, January 07, 2008

Cow Milk Is Creepy

Now that my family has been drinking strictly soymilk for four years it seems strange to me that I ever drank cow milk. We quit drinking cow milk years ago because of all the hormones and antibiotics and who knows what else is in there. My sons, 4 year old Sammy and 2 year old Pete, have never had a glass of cow milk.

Let's face it, cow milk is actually cow mother's milk. Cows normally eat grass, which is inedible to humans. Cow mother's milk is designed for cow babies, not human babies. The only mother's milk I want in my children is human mother's milk, preferably their actual mother's mother's milk.

How in the world did we start drinking animal mother's milk? Maybe some cave lady ran dry and noticed the domesticated wolf feeding her cubs in the corner of the cave and laid her infant down with the cubs. Who knows? It's creepy, mon!

Now it's a multi-trillion dollar operation. It does a body good? Hmm, when that much money is involved you can bet that the product ain't good for your baby.

I recently saw an Ovaltine commercial on that obnoxious moving picture box in the livingroom and those kids were yelling, "More Ovaltine, Mom!" and I got a craving for a big glass of ice cold milk with a tablespoon or four of Hershey's chocolate syrple (any Roger Miller fans out there?). That's when I realized how long it's been since I've actually tasted milk and now it's a blogpost.

It's just like all the other stuff that's force-fed to us. Somehow "they" came up with a forty hour workweek. What? Somehow "they" decided that we should all be driving cars and covering our planet with highways and parking lots. What? Forty thousand people die every year in America in car accidents and I'm upset about a mere three thousand dying every year in a useless war? Where's my perspective? And this computer in front of me makes me nervous. Listen to it humming and whirring. What kind of weird emissions am I breathing in? All this is future blog material. Stay tuned for more fun and games.

Last thing - soymilk ain't milk. It's a filtrate. It's like juice. Milk is a special word that should be used only for what a mother is amazingly capable of providing for her beautiful baby.

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